Why there’s still a place for a Celebration of Life after direct cremation

Direct cremation is increasingly chosen for its simplicity, practicality and lack of ceremony, and for many people that feels like the right approach. It removes the pressure of arranging a funeral at speed, it allows families to take a breath. One of my own family members wants to have a direct cremation when the time comes and when I asked them what influenced this choice, they said:

"I don't want the bereaved to shoulder a bill of several thousand pounds, and I hope to minimise the distress for my loved ones (seeing the coffin carried in is the last straw for some people). Plus, I'd hate people to worry about getting a traditional funeral 'right'."

Yet even when the practical goodbye of a direct cremation is complete, there’s often a lingering need for something more. People still want to come together, share stories, remember quirks and kindnesses, and acknowledge the place that this person held in their lives. A Celebration of Life offers the space for that - it’s not rushed, not formal and not bound by tradition. 

A celebration can happen on your own time

Because direct cremation takes care of the practical aspects privately, you’re free to hold a Celebration of Life whenever it feels right. Some families gather a week later, others wait a month or more. By then, the first wave of logistics has usually passed, emotions feel a little steadier and people have more room to reflect on what they truly want from the ceremony. This timing often allows the gathering to feel more considered, more personal and more honest. There’s no pressure to squeeze meaning into a 40-minute crematorium slot. There’s space to breathe. 

Make the day about who they were

A Celebration of Life isn’t tied to a particular venue or set of expectations, either. It can be shaped entirely around the person you’re remembering. Many families choose: 

• A meaningful location such as a garden, beach, woodland, community hall or even someone’s home, somewhere that naturally reflects the person’s character.
• Relaxed or colourful clothing that honours the person’s personality rather than formality.
• A memory table or keepsake display, filled with photos, objects and small mementos that quietly tell their story.
• Music that mattered to them, whether uplifting, calming, sentimental or joyfully unexpected.
• Shared stories, poems or readings, sometimes read by family and friends, sometimes spoken by me as the celebrant, sometimes both.

The tone can be gentle, light-hearted, reflective or a mixture of all three. Laughter often finds a place beside tears, and that blend can be one of the most healing parts.

Let the event be shaped by love, not convention

When there’s no rulebook, families often discover what feels most natural. Some choose a simple gathering with tea, cake and storytelling. Others plan a picnic in a favourite spot, plant a tree, light candles, write messages on memory tags or share a meal that meant something to their loved one. These small, human touches often become the moments people remember most. A direct cremation takes care of the practical farewell, but a Celebration of Life provides the emotional one. Together they can create a balance that helps people grieve, remember and honour a life in a way that feels true.

How I can help

If you’d like support planning a Celebration of Life that reflects your loved one with honesty and care, I can help you create a ceremony that feels right for you. I work with families to gather memories, select readings and music, and design a structure that suits the tone you want. The process is unhurried and collaborative, and the ceremony is written entirely for your person, not pulled from a template. You’re welcome to contact me if you’d like to talk through possibilities.